First call 11:20 am. Man answered, “Hello, who are you today?” No idea which scammer that was! Rinoa was calling from a different number, so no clue how he knew.

Jessica Wilson vs Martin Edward (Mr. Edwierd / Mr. Ed) & James Dawson -Geek Squad

Refund amount $848.80

Scammer says it’s for 3 devices, which had expired after 2 years.

Martin said that we needed to hang up so the manager can call. She booped in his face.

James Dawson, Senior Banking Officer, called us back.

 

He said the line was being monitored by the FTC and others – recorded line under the surveillance of the Better Business Bureau and the FTC.

Jessica: “What is the BBB?”

James tried to explain what the BBB is. His explanation was convoluted!

Jessica: “Kind of like the internet police?”

 

Jessica: “’Working on updates.’ What does this mean?” [crickets]

 Rinoa added a 25% to the updating screen

James: “Which YouTube channel are you running?”

James said he sent the refund, which will be deposited in her account in 2 hours. He was still sus.

James asked her to bring up the e-mail she received. Said he had a copy and he’d look it up. He offered to pay her if she could make him a demo version of Chase. He said he has a friend in Chase and can speed the refund up from 2-3 hours to 2-3 minutes.

James booped after a few fake, closing niceties. Rinoa said he was snooping through some of her files, so she cut the connection.

Total Time Wasted: 31min 10sec

 

 

PayPal

Samsung S22 charge

Refund amount $788

Scammer requested to be put on speaker phone. We got to laugh at the fun distortion sound effect, which he didn’t appreciate! He asked to be removed from speakerphone soon after!

He tried to connect to her phone, but she said Quicksupport on Playstore was not available for “Kitkat 10.5. Please upgrade.”

He booped.

Total Time Wasted: 4min 32sec

 

 

Rinoa: “I think we’re about to enter the best call ever, if they answer the phone.”

But they didn’t answer the phone. She texted them. “I’m interested in becoming part of the Illuminati, please. I will do anything…”

 

 

Incoming call – They booped without talking. (Rinoa could barely hear him. Most viewers couldn’t hear anything, She called him back, but nobody answered.

 

 

Nick -Geek Squad

We had received an e-mail.

He put us on forever hold. We booped.

 

 

Jessica Wilson vs Ben & Kevin -Geek Squad

Refund amount $249.89; $249.99

Transfer amount $2,500

Ben: “It’s for a Geek Squad membership.”

This guy kept breathing into the phone mic, very annoying!

 Ben: “Type geeksquad.com in the browser. Look for ‘purchase & order’ or ‘order & purchase.’ See anything that says ‘payment option?’ Looking for ‘return and exchange.’ Now look for ‘Payment options.’” Ben’s directions are clear as mud!

 

Jessica: “Okay, thank you, Mr. Chode”

Ben: “What did you say?”

Jessica: “Mr. Ben.”

Ben: “Ok, I heard something else.”

LOL!

 

Ben has nothing to do, but likes games such as Call of Duty or Fortnight.

 We were transferred to Senior Manager, Kevin. Jessica was telling Kevin about the things Ben said but Ben said to forget whatever was said with Ben.

 Kevin had word from his bank. The bank had approved transaction. It just needed small verification from Jessica’s end.

 Kevin got angry because he couldn’t get a word in. He said he would connect her to the banking server so she could verify amount, etc.

 Kevin: “I am going to make yourself understand that.”

 Jessica repeatedly pointed out that their fake updating screen was preventing her from verifying on the computer. He got very worked up.

 Kevin: “Oh my god. You really have a big problem ma’am.”

 Kevin: “Do you have any problems, ma’am? I think you should go to a doctor.”

Kevin: “You’re not letting me complete a sentence. You just keep talking and talking and talking.”  

 

Kevin: “Do you have duct tape?”

Jessica: “Yeah.”

Kevin: “Put it in your mouth. Tape your mouth up. Don’t speak.”

 

Kevin told Jessica to go to Walmart for gift cards. The banks are closed today and he knew it. Because he couldn’t get Jessica to stop talking and asking questions, he stopped speaking and just wrote everything on notepad. “buy 2 pieces of $500 walmart gift from the walmart store.” He told her to go to another store after she gets the 2 Walmart giftcards.

 Kevin said that Jessica was barking like a dog. Jessica closed her laptop cover and put her shoes on. Kevin insisted she return to her computer so he could “show her something.” When she woke up her computer, she could see that “someone” was typing “camera.”

 Kevin asked if she saw a banking page behind the camera, wouldn’t answer Rinoa’s direct questions about why he tried to open the camera. He said he had no access to the computer, then threatened to restart that computer that he supposedly had no access to!

 Kevin demanded Jessica restart the computer now or she’ll lose it and won’t be able to get into it anymore. Jessica didn’t want to restart and called him a creep for trying to open the camera. He finally confessed that he had tried to open it up, to see if she had a camera.

 Kevin said that the computer was not on but Jessica said it was. More back-and-forth on that topic. He finally reconnected Jessica said *now* she had shut down the computer because he put the blue screen back on.

 

 Kevin said he needed to remove the blue thing, so he needed her to turn the computer back on. Jessica refused. Jessica confronted him over the fact that the amount of her savings moved to her checking.

Kevin said to close everything, then click on Windows key.

Jessica: “Why?”

Kevin: “Because I’m guiding you something.”

Kevin said it was “showing shut down over here.”

 

Once connected again, Kevin put up the blue screen again, so Jessica immediately closed the lid. Kevin said he terminated the blue screen & she wouldn’t see it again. More arguing.

 

Jessica: “Go put your head in a toilet bowl.”

Kevin: “No, I don’t need to do that, but definitely you need to do it.”

 

He was still trying to get her to turn on the computer again. Jessica called him a scammer, asked how to remove him from her computer. He said he locked up her computer. She said she saw him do it. Arguing escalates. Hilarious! Jessica said that her brother was a computer expert & would take care of it.

 Kevin resorted to profanity. Rinoa booped in his face, mid-word. “No last word for you, my friend!”

 

MelonBuddy Translations Throughout the Call:

I’m about to hang up on her.

She’s a crazy customer.

 

Total Time Wasted: 1hr 51min 20sec

 

 

Rinoa: “I can’t be trusted with glass.”

 

 

Called Patrick at eBay, but Rinoa thought she was calling the Illuminati.

 Patrick: “No, it’s eBay customer service.” Oops.

 He asked what her e-mail says. She repeated the Illuminati text.

 He booped.

 Total Time Wasted: 59sec

Rinoa called the correct number and got an automated message that said it would try to connect her. But they were not available. Please leave a message. Rinoa left a message with Margaret’s voice.

 

 Jessica Wilson vs Kelly Jones -Windows Defender Security

UltraViewer was used.

 

Kelly: “I’m running a quick security scan on your computer.”

Jessica: “How long does the scam usually take?”

 

Jessica said she “was browsing Facebook” when she got error code 40286510

 Windows RG was used. Jessica’s screen was filled with lots of pop-up “.dll” error boxes.

 Kelly: “Trojan virus found on computer,”

She said there was an IP address breach, etc. Kelly needed to install network security.

 Kelly tried to pull up Jessica’s camera. Jessica called her on it!

 Kelly bailed & booped.

Total Time Wasted: 16min 11sec

 

 

 Margaret tried to call the Illuminati back. Then texted them. A man called back. Rinoa answered but forgot to use Margaret’s voice.

He had a really thick accent and was hard to understand.

He asked her if she had WhatsApp. He told her that she needed to purchase 7 items needed for the initiation which will only cost $200. One of the items was mustard seed.

 Rinoa: “Explain to me all seven items that need to be purchased and blessed.”

He also explained that she would get $1,000,000, a house, a car of her choice, etc.

 

Rinoa: “Is it true that immortality is right there with it?”

Scammer: “Like, you won’t have to die again?”

Rinoa: “Yeah, I won’t have to die again. Yeah.”

Scammer: “That can be possible because we are working, the top leaders and some preacher people are on the work so that will be possible.”

Rinoa: “OK. Yeah, ‘cause I hated dying the first time. I don’t want that to happen again. It’s very painful.”

 

They conducted a Q&A about procedures and such.

 Rinoa: “Are there aliens? I just want to know. Are they out there?”

 

Rinoa: “Do I have to dress a certain way to meet the Grand Master?”

He said she’d need to wear a white gown.

 

He said that none of these items were available at the store except for the mustard seed. He explained that these things must be bought directly from the temple.

Rinoa: “I definitely have some spare organs lying around. I think I can manage that one.”

He said that, once she purchased all the items, she would get a call from the Grand Master.

Scammer: “Buy all the stuff at the temple. Then we can do the initiation… do you have the $200?”

When all the things are purchased, initiation will be tomorrow.

He asked if she had CashApp. She said she didn’t.

Rinoa: “Please, my sister.”

Rinoa: “I have a rival… once friends… I need to get into the ring… get the vial of immortality”

She wanted to pay him using AnyDesk but he didn’t use AnyDesk. She said she had the $200 in cash. So, he asked if she knew about the Bitcoin ATM. She kept saying she could send the cash now through AnyDesk. He kept saying CashApp. Next, he mentioned Walmart. Then he was talking about CashApp again.

Scammer: “You trying to hack me or what?”

He decided that he wanted a Steam giftcard instead. He wanted 4 cards of $50 each.

Rinoa: “[Steam] is how I bought my dog… it’s a little late, 3 months.”

 inoa: “As shall the last day be, the Edin shall emerge from the Temple of Doom and bless thy subjects.”

 

Scammer: “The third one is Ogirigon. Do you know that?”

Rinoa: “Is that the magical buttplug that vibrates when you’re playing a chess game?”

 

Rinoa booped to go get the cards. She said she would call him back once she had the cards. She said she would make a fake card and send it to him later.

 Rinoa: “I’ll call you again – be nearby – over and out.”

Total Time Wasted: 26min 59sec

 

EMAIL FROM THE ILLUMINATI:

MEMBERSHIP INITIATION PROCESS 

This is the initiation whereby some sacred initiation items are paid for into the Illuminati branch temple for your membership initiation and below are the list of items and the total cost.

Afiamlimhen

Edin 

Ogirigon

Illuminati Saint 

Illuminati Oil 

Mustard Seed 

Illuminati wealth powder 

In-total all these items will cost you $200 And you will be making the payment for the items to the Illuminati branch temple because these items are sacred and are only sold in the Illuminati temple. Hence you are to state if you are willing to proceed further and when you will be ready to purchase the items to commence your initiation. 

Hail Illuminati 

Hail the light 

Hail Illuminati